Actually I don't, Baldrick. What I have are several lists and a whole crammed dream-brain of ideas about which projects I want to focus on next, and which products I ultimately want to order for my table efforts, and what I can do to balance that 50/50 fanart/original requirement for my Otakon table. I've begun working on a sortof small pet project that involves painting beta fish with astrological themes, featuring a constellation and a mineral or gem for that star sign. Ultimately, I plan to make stickers of those and possibly an all-in-one print. I thought I'd be farther along on them than I am, but as some of you know I became suddenly ill with appendicitis and had to have immediate surgery. I've been recovering for a week and a half, hating stairs, and still finished my cosplays for Katsucon. The Artist Alley there featured some serious talent, and it was crammed to the brim with people. In other words, I was so overstimulated that I'm pretty sure I missed half of the alley just because I was on some other planet where I wasn't smashed up against hundreds of cosplayers inching through an aisle much hotter than the temperature anywhere else in the convention center. Still, what I did see gave me ideas for what I want to do, and what I DON'T want to do.
Fanart is both fun and dangerous for so many reasons; I get to play with my favorite characters from my favorite series and it's pretty liberating after years of being made to feel shame for my interests. However, I've been made to remember that my fandoms are usually older than my con demographic, that even if I really enjoy an artist's style lacking a character that I am passionate about can mean a lost sale for them, and of course I'm also funny about copyright. As are the owners of said intellectual property, and rightly so. In other words, while my work tends to fill a lot of niche interests, I really need to focus on bracing myself and putting my original ideas out there, front and center. I've had novel ideas for years (and have written quite a lot on them, actually), comic ideas, graphic novel ideas, series and character ideas, and really I just need to try and get my ADHD ass to focus. It's overwhelming. Very, very overwhelming. Marketing is hard, and finding my audience is hard because my audience is scattered around different interests.
I feel caught between several worlds; the one that loves anime, the one that loves literature, the one that loves her Craft (of the Witch Variety) and the Mythology that comes with it, her music fandoms, and the things that have always shaped my personality and my dreams. And of course, everything I do is a mixture of this.
I hope that if I am able to complete at least 2 more of my BTS pics to fill out the members I am lacking, and if I can finish the Nu'est pic I have in mind, AND the zodiac fishies, I'll feel ok with just going nuts on my own original stuff.
Don't let anyone tell you being an artist is easy. There's a lot riding on my success at this, so I feel a lot more pressure than your average bear I think. I have to find a way to make a monthly income to pay for my now copious hospital bills and student loan debt and have enough left to eat. It's not fair to my husband for him to fuss over it because I'm so broken and can't work 9-5.
I've thought about selling my work elsewhere than etsy because of their shady charges and dealings lately, but making my own website to sell from worth a damn would cost about $25 dollars a month I don't have yet. I'm applying to more and more cons and just hope to make back table cost until I become more known as an artist. Ugh.
Anyway, here are two of my fishies. Hopefully I can get something started tonight; the world feels heavy right now.
